Non-Violent Communication
Non-Violent Communication Information
Non-Violent Communication (NVC) centers conversations around needs (non-negotiable stuff: security, safety, fulfillment), desires (how we like to get our needs met), and feelings (information directing us to our met and unmet needs). It also uses the language of requests (what we can ask of others to help us get our needs met) and boundaries (the edges of our physical/emotional/energetic availability). It asks us to practice deep listening to ourselves to know our needs and desires and use request and boundaries to communicate them.
Non-Violent Communication (NVC) centers conversations around needs (non-negotiable stuff: security, safety, fulfillment), desires (how we like to get our needs met), and feelings (information directing us to our met and unmet needs). It also uses the language of requests (what we can ask of others to help us get our needs met) and boundaries (the edges of our physical/emotional/energetic availability). It asks us to practice deep listening to ourselves to know our needs and desires and use request and boundaries to communicate them.
- Here's a link to a lengthier definition of NVC
- Here's a feelings inventory list
- Here's a needs inventory list
- Here's a basic needs we all have list
- Here's the non-violent communication script
- Here's a link to a $10.96 e-book of Non-Violent Communication
Boundary Setting
Here's a couple of websites that lead you through some exercises that help you to identify boundaries for yourself.
- Oprah has a pretty sweet step by step process for setting boundaries for yourself. You can access that via this link.
- Here's a link to a "No BS Guide" to Setting Boundaries by healthline
- Tip from our Healthy Communication Lab
- It's just as important to value other people's boundaries as it is to set your own boundaries! When someone tells you "no" practice saying some version of "thanks for taking care of yourself" while also acknowledging any sort of feelings that that "non" brought up for you.
Practicing Consent
Practicing consent is important in and out of the bedroom. It's a vital part of preventing harm and conflict in everyday conversation.
- The National Sexual Violence Resource Center on Everyday Consent
- Teen Vogue on "5 Ways We Get Consent That Has Nothing to Do With Sex"
- Teen Vogue on "Consent 101: Everything You Need to Know About Consent That You Never Learned in Sex Ed"
- Ted Talk on "Cultivating a Culture of Consent" by the founders of Spring Up
- Spring Up's "Consent and Power" Podcast
